I feel so miserable. i dont know why i'm feeling this, cuz i hate it. i always admit that it's my fault but how come its mine? i havent done anything wrong so far. and i always get to become the loser. people say its not love. okay, sure, its not love, but what else rather than love would hurt you this badly? i dont wanna be the loser here, nobody wants to be. why cant he just act as ordinary as if he doesnt know the whole story? crap...
crying wont help i know, but what if u feel so helpless to the point that even if u struggle and try to get away is futile? hmmm... i'm so confused!!! i dont want him to get out of my life, rather, He's my life. snap! ms. priya's right, i fancied love but since he came into my life i never looked besides him again. i've been given a lot of chances to change. i did grab each and every one of it. but the thing here is that whenever he shows his "not - so - rude" part of him i always get back to the same spot. it's a never ending cycle! a pathetic cycle.. :(
1 Comments:
Can't help but reflect on the entry. It is really hard to win in this circumstance. It's a lose-lose situation. You continue to want it - it only ends up in disappointment or a reality check which we won't enjoy, OR you stop it - but you end up lying to yourself. I've heard this interesting example. On how when you boil water, it is still there. Same with our feelings, when we hide them, we are just fooling and deceiving ourselves.
My advice - continue on the path with which your instinct points you to. It's usually the right one.
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Anonymous, at 7:17 PM GMT+8
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